Trauma Responses Look Different In Real Life. Here's How to Spot Them.

Going beyond fight, flight, freeze, and fawn.

Photo by Jax on Unsplash

Trauma has a sneaky way of shaping our lives, often without us even realizing it. We hear about the classic trauma responses—fight, flight, freeze, and fawn—but what does that really look like day-to-day? The truth is, trauma responses can show up in ways that don’t always scream "I'm traumatized!"

They can disguise themselves as everyday habits, behaviors, or even personality traits that we just assume are “part of who we are.” But if we dig a little deeper, we might find that these reactions are actually rooted in past experiences, and recognizing them is the first step toward healing.

Maybe you're quick to get defensive (fight), or you're always looking for an exit strategy when things get uncomfortable (flight). Or perhaps you freeze up in tough situations, feeling stuck and unable to act, even when you know what needs to be done. Then there's fawning—people-pleasing to avoid conflict or gain approval. Sound familiar?

By recognizing when and how these trauma responses show up in real life, you can start to create space for healthier behaviors. It's not about fixing yourself because you’re not broken. It’s about understanding why you respond the way you do and giving yourself permission to choose something different—something that serves you better. Healing is possible, and it starts with awareness. Let's talk about how to get there.